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  #46  
Old 10-29-2001, 04:02 PM
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2-4-6-8...Moving parts? Must lubricate!

<Oh the places we'll go! And the things that we'll do When our oil pans are filled with black dinosaur goo! >

Now if you asked Shotsky....and he ain't nobody's fool;
no ancient fossil made, any "fossil fuel".

It was little, tiny microbes, down deep in the rock;
that made our reservoirs of petroleum stock!

In "Deep, Hot, Biosphere" by a man named Gold;
a scientist at Cornell, made a statement bold,
that rather than running out of that deep black ooze,
that the microbes are making all the goo we can use!

And that life on this planet...now please don't pout,
arose on the Earth from the inside-out!

So when you fill your crankcase, with the latest oily blend,
just thank those little microbes, whose job will never end!

Don
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  #47  
Old 10-29-2001, 04:10 PM
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Unhappy

Well, I guess my hopes that Don wouldn't stumble upon this thread are now shattered. His response doesn't make any "synth."
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  #48  
Old 10-29-2001, 05:27 PM
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OB

<His response doesn't make any "synth.>

O.K....anyone got a copy of "Hooked on Phonics" that Randy can borrow? Don
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  #49  
Old 10-29-2001, 06:24 PM
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Rufus I am

So the cars and the trucks all over the nation
Are not powered by dinosaur putrefecation?

And to fuel the combustion of me, and of you
Little microbes are making petroleum poo?
While water and sunlight and air they eschew
They make 10W30 primordial stew?

This is good news I tell you, and good news indeed
If we always have all of the black stuff we need...

'Cause if we never run out of this wonderful goo
Then the places we'll go! and the things that we'll do!
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  #50  
Old 10-29-2001, 06:43 PM
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So oil is not old dinosaurs and trees,
from whom the earth oil did squeeze?
Instead you say, it's the poos and pees
of these little microbal beasties?

Well, if so, to my ignorance I must plead.
There's only one thing more to know that I need.
Pray tell, and tell with all speed,
Upon what do these little bugs feed?
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  #51  
Old 10-29-2001, 07:18 PM
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Talking

Quote:
Originally posted by svxter
So oil is not old dinosaurs and trees,
from whom the earth oil did squeeze?
Instead you say, it's the poos and pees
of these little microbal beasties?

Well, if so, to my ignorance I must plead.
There's only one thing more to know that I need.
Pray tell, and tell with all speed,
Upon what do these little bugs feed?
Based on geography & lay of the land,
I say the beasties must feast upon sand.
Ron.
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  #52  
Old 10-29-2001, 10:41 PM
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Good grief. We're on the razor's edge of insanity. I think I'm going to be schick.
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  #53  
Old 10-30-2001, 08:20 AM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Ron Mummert


Based on geography & lay of the land,
I say the beasties must feast upon sand.
Ron.
Upon sand? And there you make your stand?
You, a man who stands on sand?

I confess to being in shock.
What if all they have is rock?
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  #54  
Old 10-30-2001, 10:56 AM
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wee beastie food

A few years back...
down deep in the ocean.
Scientists found some things.
of which they had no notion.

Tiny bacteria in the ocean so deep
feeding on minerals that did seep
from thermal vents in the ocean floor
out of which boiling water did pour.

My,my said the scientists...it gave them a fright
to find life on the bottom without any light.
Microbes living on things that would kill most things dead,
made many get dizzy from new thoughts in their head.

Perhaps Gold is right? said a Ph.D. doc,
that microbes could eat the minerals in rock?
And since Gold had predicted the life they just found,
he went to a bar, and bought each one a round!

Don
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  #55  
Old 10-30-2001, 11:05 AM
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Our goo making friends, living far out of sight
Have plenty to satisfy their apatite

For starters, they’ve amber lager quite fine
And a dry garnetini with olivine

Clams on the half shale, and tastier yet…
Quartz of basaltic vinaigrette

Rock candy, mashed potash, and fresh marble cake
All conspire, microbial hunger to slake.

Grilled rib-eye slate and key limestone pie
They dine just as finely as you or as I!
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  #56  
Old 10-30-2001, 11:18 AM
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I definitely want some applesauce!!!

Must think, must think......
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  #57  
Old 10-30-2001, 11:23 AM
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but suddenly, twirling and swirling about,
What should appear but a strong water spout.

It sucks 'em it bucks 'em round and round,
Pitches 'em, switches 'em up from their down.

They're reeling and squealing and looking for rock,
but the dizzying swirl makes them slip, swirl and rock.

Our adventurous gooies go from here, then, to there,
And the landing they'll make, who knows of the where?

Will they land in the ocean, will they end up on land?
Will they vanish completely, with the wave of a hand?

The spout then subsides. The silence is loud.
Our microbats settle and gather and crowd.

They check themselves out for aches and for pains,
For broken fingers and vericose veins.

Then as they look up, their eyes fill with wonder.
This spout has made a magnificent blunder.

Because once, they were free and disposed to be happy.
Why should nature do something so crappy.

They've found themselves captured, held and enslaved,
among pipes and tankers 'neath the splashy blue waves.

Then they travel from seabeds in goo to their necks,
Then they're poured, oh so slowly, into MY SVX!!!!!
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Last edited by Aredubjay; 10-30-2001 at 11:27 AM.
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  #58  
Old 10-30-2001, 11:56 AM
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BUT sweet liberation is not far away
For something most fateful occured on this day

There still was a chance to get out of this car
A doorway to freedom left slightly ajar

They waited and watched for the right circumstance
On a trip down the highway they spotted their chance

They swarmed to the plug with a glorious shout
and twisted and pushed til the drain plug fell out

And back to their homes in the earth they did scurry
To poop up some more of that volatile slurry

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  #59  
Old 10-30-2001, 12:01 PM
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Damn! That's GOOD applesauce!
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Randy Johnson
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1992 SVX PPG Pace Car Replica 110+k
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"Reading is my favorite Holiday"
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  #60  
Old 10-30-2001, 07:23 PM
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Bravo!

<For starters, they’ve amber lager quite fine
And a dry garnetini with olivine

Clams on the half shale, and tastier yet…
Quartz of basaltic vinaigrette

Rock candy, mashed potash, and fresh marble cake
All conspire, microbial hunger to slake.

Grilled rib-eye slate and key limestone pie
They dine just as finely as you or as I!>

Rufus, an OUTSTANDING contribution! As fine a mixture of puns and poetry (and geology) as I have seen a quite a while. I am sure I speak for the others when I say that you have earned the coveted GOLD STAR award for P&P above and beyond the humdrum pun. By gum! Don
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