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  #1  
Old 05-24-2002, 07:19 AM
solarsvx solarsvx is offline
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Location: orlando fla
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u guys might get a kick out of this "joke"

u know whene u are a turbo freak if.......


*When your real first name becomes your second name and your new first name becomes Turbo.... Turbo Mike.. Turbo Matt, Turbo Kev, Turbo Dan....
*You dont buy lunch at school becuase your saving up for that Turbo Timer...
*You dont go to the movies anymore, cause you want that Boost Controler....
*You barely ever buy your girl anything anymore, even on her birthday!!
*You flip when someone asks you for a dollar, and tell them how do you expect me to buy _______....
*You compare your girl to your Turbo... when you both get into an argument...
*You keep your car running, and get inside the house, and yell at ur lil bro to go turn off the car.... or he wont chill with u anymore....(even though he doesn't in the first place, lol)
*Before you get the turbo u tell all your friends youll let them drive when you get the turbo, and end up never letting anyone drive.
*You dont trust anyone with your Keys, even your mom who raised you....
*When you cant even pay your bills because uve bought too much stuff for your engine to handle the turbo........
*You buy octane booster All The Time!!
*When your always broke cause all your paycheck goes to ur engine...
* on the highway people make hand gestures for you to use your b.o.v as if you were a big rig honking.
*when you change broken gearsets more often than you change your engine oil*
*when old ladies crap their Depends because you opened the w/g in their proximity*
*when you make your own BOV and w/g sounds while driving your girls NA car*
*when you see a IC on a Fuso Bus and wonder if you can make it fit on a Teg*
*when your girl makes all autoparts stores OFFLIMITS on her day*
*when you don't mind spending $50 for spark plugs but have a heart attack when you Big Mac combo cost $6*
*when you don't mind paying $2.50/gal for high octane fuel but raise all kinds of hell when a beer cost more than $2*
*You set all your clocks ahead a couple of mins to make up for "idle time."
*After your 30th speeding ticket the cops require you to attend "boosters anonymous" before giving your license back.
*Your car is permanently "in the shop." (I'm busy *****, just understand )
*You gotta work a second job to pay for your enormous gas bills.
*You stare at your boost gauge more than Britney's titties.
*You have frequent nightmares about your A/F ratio.
*Your car sneezes more than a room full of sick people.
*Mustang GTs are your favorite food group.
*Your stock clutch smokes more than the lunch lady.
*You've actually USED that chrome fire extinguisher you keep in your car.
*You go through axles faster than your slutty neighbor goes through boyfriends.
*When you study compressor maps more than you study for that Biology test coming up tomorrow.
*When you start impressing your Physics professor by knowing every conversion factor for units of pressure when nobody else knows what the hell you're talking about.
*When you postpone most of your errands for the evening time when it is cooler outside.
* when your girlfriend wishes she was a turbo because I spend more time thinking about it.
* when you get off your car and walk away, you just have to look at the IC and tell yourself, "damn it looks good."
* You look under your hood more than you look in the mirror
* Your fuel consumption has 2 modes: Normal and Oprah
* Your car radio breaks and you don't notice for a month
* 1st gear finishes faster than it takes you to finish flooring it
* You're the only person to turn around when you hear a big rig motor by
* Your speedo is the least used of your gauges
* To you, the word 'Spool' has nothing to do with a printer
* You never buy the 'cheap' gas.
* Factory turbo cars give you a warm feeling inside
* You look for an intercooler on every car you see
* You think boosting can get you out of any problem
* You blow off to get off !
*when you walk around the halls of work making turbo sounds like the motor screaming then have the touch of the BOV screaming loud...
* When all you look at now is the front of the car to see the FMIC.
* When you buy the Gillete Mach 3 Turbo razor to shave.
* when it takes you 3minutes to get a joke and so you blame it on the turbo lag.
*When mothers snatch up their kids off of the sidewalks when you let the open downpipe blow. Thats my favorite.
*When old people think you just blew out a tire next to them on the highway
* When your fuel guage gets to the ground before your wheels do
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  #2  
Old 05-24-2002, 11:24 AM
SVXPerformance
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Smile

That was great. I got a good laugh. Keep on posting more if you have. I got to foward this to people...
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