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  #1  
Old 08-20-2007, 06:22 PM
Noir's Avatar
Noir Noir is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Mullet Country
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today's rants: some female drivers...

First, I would like to say that I'm not targetting women drivers and such. Tis only coincidence that today three drivers that earned this rant were in fact women.

I do forsee that one day in the near future I will be arrested for assault and battery on ovaries.

Driver #1 - African-American woman in a newer model black Mercedes decides to ignore the glaring red stoplight and make a hasty left turn while the 'catwalk' was littered with people crossing (me being one of them). It's a shame that I have retarded lugie reflexes or she would have been awarded the Noir's slimy lugie in the face since her passenger window was open followed by a Ovary Punch after she got out of the car to question my motives for slime-ing her face.**Note - In GA it's a moving violation NOT to stop for people in catwalks.

Driver #2 - In the Teacher/Faculty/Guest parking facility I was happily moving along in the SVX following the ONE-WAY arrows and signs out of the deck when some stupid blonde Caucasian broad in a silver Nissan Altima decides that some slut fairy must have switched the ONE-WAY signs and painted directional arrows in jest due to the probable possibility that it might be April Fool's Day. She came about a foot and a half from hitting my beloved SVX. She then had the nerve to sit there and NOT get out of the way expecting me to move my car. Needless to say we were at a deadlock until she backed the eff out of the one vehicle thoroughfare. She would have suffered massive pummels to the ovaries if she hit my 'X' followed by me going to jail.

Driver #3 - After encountering Driver #2 on the way out of the parking deck, I decided to fill up on gas (1/4 tank left) so that I wouldn't have to find some place in the morning traffic. I pull into the Quiktrip near my home and find a good pump to 'fill her up'. Anyway, I'm standing there waiting and I see some Caucasian woman in a SUV pulling up to the 'Entrance Only' outlet for the gas station. This outlet was designed to allow cars in because it is literally a few feet from the traffic intersection. Someone was coming in and she decided to go out. The huge DO NOT ENTER sign obviously was written in some language other than Engrish and the giant yellow arrow pointing the opposite way on black tarmac must be for decoration only. So nice of the gas station to put up such colorful accents for their customers to appreciate right? Since I wasn't directly involved in this incident, I'm going to have to let it slide, but I do believe the other driver should have given her the 2x ovaries punch.

/rant off.

Last edited by Noir; 08-20-2007 at 06:25 PM.
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  #2  
Old 08-20-2007, 10:44 PM
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Landshark Landshark is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: The Burgh
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you seem angry. you should ride yore sk8board more often.

you should also get some Hella Supertones.

i had some retard pull out on me as i was coming down the road. i stopped. he stopped, still blocking the road. i layed on the Hellas for what seemed like an entire minute until his synapses started firing again and he put the car in reverse, and got out of my way, so i could continue on.
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2005 Forester XT Premium (Crystal Gray Metallic) SOLD!
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  #3  
Old 08-20-2007, 10:51 PM
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shelfy shelfy is offline
I have a problem. :(
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Littleton, CO USA
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crazy honkers.
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1997 Subaru SVX LSi "Svetlana" #185 of 640 - 09/1996 - Polo Green Pearl - 34k miles

1992 Subaru SVX LS-L "Everett" #8738 - 01/1992 - Ebony Pearl - 139k miles - 5MT shifty - Sold 07/31/2011

1992 Subaru SVX LS-L "Sven" #1599 - 05/1991 - Claret - 168k miles - Traded 05/11/2005


2023 Subaru Crosstrek Limited CVT - Crystal White Pearl - 2.8k miles
2021 Subaru Forester 2.5i Limited CVT - Horizon Blue Pearl - 17k miles
2023 Volkswagen Jetta S 6MT - Pure White - 2.6k miles
2020 Hyundai Ioniq Limited EV - Ceramic White - 30k miles
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  #4  
Old 08-20-2007, 10:55 PM
Noir's Avatar
Noir Noir is offline
Ever Vigilant He Never Sleeps.
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Mullet Country
Posts: 5,021
hmm..hella supertones...can they fit in my backpack?

either that or a really loud airhorn
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  #5  
Old 08-20-2007, 10:56 PM
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shelfy shelfy is offline
I have a problem. :(
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Littleton, CO USA
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Registered SVX
crazy backpackers.
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Kenneth

1997 Subaru SVX LSi "Svetlana" #185 of 640 - 09/1996 - Polo Green Pearl - 34k miles

1992 Subaru SVX LS-L "Everett" #8738 - 01/1992 - Ebony Pearl - 139k miles - 5MT shifty - Sold 07/31/2011

1992 Subaru SVX LS-L "Sven" #1599 - 05/1991 - Claret - 168k miles - Traded 05/11/2005


2023 Subaru Crosstrek Limited CVT - Crystal White Pearl - 2.8k miles
2021 Subaru Forester 2.5i Limited CVT - Horizon Blue Pearl - 17k miles
2023 Volkswagen Jetta S 6MT - Pure White - 2.6k miles
2020 Hyundai Ioniq Limited EV - Ceramic White - 30k miles
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  #6  
Old 08-21-2007, 05:16 AM
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JaySVX JaySVX is offline
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I can see your concern. For some time now i've been seriously considering purchasing an air horn for my vehicle, as well as building a megaphone in, just for those "get the hell out of my way" moments. Fortuantly they're all over the internet. THe loudest air horn i've been able to find thus far is 139db. While i'm not sure that'll be loud enough, it is certainly a step up from the stock failing/falling apart horn on my current car. The megaphone wired into the car is excelent, as there's a location that people constantly make illegal turns distroying traffic patterns and creating major back-up's around where i live.

http://www.speeding.co.uk/acatalog/Horns.html

I'm thinking Stebel Nautilus Twin Tone ULTRA COMPACT Air Horn and Move It ! Microphone Amp & Speaker combo to take care of my road problems.
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Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, scotch in one hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming HOOOOYA !!!!!
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