Just got the funniest email ever!!!

[Royal Tiger]

Who's running for the Democrats? Exactly. Just wait for a moron like Schumer or Boxer. Then you'll see what the no-agenda party has to offer. Or how about the indicted, now new Governor of NJ, Corzine? No one, from either side, has put forth the agenda that is most in need of changing, welfare. Anyone with the guts to tear that apart and fix it will get my vote.

[demonsvx]

Im thinking Bill Frist, Hillary Clinton, Charles Schumer and Condellezza Rice will probaly be on the next ballot. But it doesnt matter to me Bush has made this country a police state and intends to bring this type of Fascism to the rest of the world. Hell they dont even show any respect to the troops who have died for his silly a$$ war. Commander in Chief should don some BDUs and be dropped into the middle of Baghdad and see how his "liberation" is "staying the course". Politicians are right up there in my book with murderers, rapists, and theives. They are just "elected" to carry these crimes out.

[Royal Tiger]

You forgot lawyers, the biggest evil in America.

[demonsvx]

Originally Posted by Tigershark

You forgot lawyers, the biggest evil in America.

Ooops My Bad

[It's Just Eric]

Screw this, Bipa, run for president

[Royal Tiger]

You have to be an American. Maybe she could take over Canada. You would only need a Division or two. It would be like invading Iowa.

[SilverSpear]

Originally Posted by It's Just Eric

Screw this, Bipa, run for president

You have my Vote Bipa... from here
You would be the coolest president evAr !!

[Electrophil]

Originally Posted by Tigershark

You have to be an American. Maybe she could take over Canada. You would only need a Division or two. It would be like invading Iowa.

Bush: What's an Iowa?
Cheney: It's the capital of Vermont.
Bush: Is Vermont a democratic country?
Cheney: Not sure, but we need to send in Haliburton to find out.
Bush: Good. I don't want the answer to come in the form of a mushroom cloud.

[Electrophil]

3 days later:

Cheney: Haliburton can go in for only 200 billion.
Bush: No problem, Clinton left us a surplus.
Cheney: They go in tomorrow to set up the cafeterias. The Army will follow and should take control within 48 hours. We will be out by the weekend with a new democratic government set up and Al Queda eliminated.
Bush: Does Iowa have oil wells?
Cheney: What's an Iowa?

[-JJ-]

hehehe, yay more of the good stuf

[Mike621]

<H1> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA</h1>

Maybe Ill just move out of the us.

I just vote for whoever would make my life the least hardest for the next couple years. IM probably not even a person according to bush's standards.

Kerry, if he did become president and even if he was a **** up, he wouldve ****ed this up the opposite way, possibly cancelling out bush and leaving our nation in a state of blah instead of a state of insanity.

K I have nothing and everything else to say but thats my $.02.

Me run for President? Naw.... in spite of the fact that only people born in the USA are eligible to run, I'd never be able to appeal to the lowest common denominator and get the votes. Politics is a funny game. Many politicians start out as well-meaning folks with strong convictions that they can make a change. No matter what level of government, once they become members of the inside power elite, things start to look very different. Many simply become overwhelmed by all the conflicting groups they now have to deal with and take the path of least resistance. Meaning that being unable to choose between all the various goups, factions, lobbies, and causes, they end up focusing on the one thing that still makes sense: getting re-elected and keeping all the nice perks that come with the job. Keeping the position or progressing to the higher levels becomes their whole goal, with everything else of secondary importance. Perhaps there are a few good people that manage to keep from being seduced, but they are in the tiny minority and don't often last long.

But the bottom line is this: the baby of an illegal immigrant, born in the USA, is eligible to later run for President. Because I was born in Canada, I can't apply for the job even if I became a US citizen. Some US citizens have more rights than others, and the land of opportunity doesn't give the same chances to all. This limitation of rights might not affect most people, but the principle is something to think about. Not all US citizens are equal, and a distinction IS made, under US law, based simply on a person's birthplace. I would argue that a baby born in another country and brought to live and grow up in the USA at a few months of age would end up just as "American" as a baby born in the USA, but the law doesn't see it that way.

I'm currently on a slow dial-up connection so I won't be posting as much while in Canada unless I can arrange something faster.

In a surprise move, Thor and Odin announced their candacy for President
and Vice President of the United States of America. A throng of surprised
reporters flocked at the Bifrost Toll Gate to hear the news. When asked
why they had decided to enter the race, Odin replied, "We thought it was
about time to take an active role once more in the affairs of Middle
Earth." Although they are not native born United States citizens, there
is a fairly obscure loophole that allows them to run : anyone who was
alive when the constitution was written did not have to be born in the USA
to be president.

When asked about their platform, few details were offered, except to say
that they would support a strong military ("Speak loudly and carry a huge
hammer"), and a return to traditional, old-fashioned values. "None of
this new-fangled nuclear family garbage," Thor added in a thundrous
voice. "We support the extended family, including clans and tribes."

At the close of the press conference, the two deities announced plans for
a question and answer session later this week.

Congress today announced that the office of President of the United States of America will be outsourced to India as of Jan. 16, 2006.

The move is being made to save the President’s $400,000 yearly salary, and also a record $521 billion in deficit expenditures and related overhead the office has incurred during the last 5 years.

‘We believe this is a wise move financially. The cost savings should be significant,’ stated Congressman Thomas Reynolds (R-WA). Reynolds, with the aid of the Government Accounting Office, has studied outsourcing of American jobs extensively. ‘We cannot expect to remain competitive on the world stage with the current level of cash outlay,’ Reynolds noted.

Mr. Bush was informed by e-mail this morning of his termination.

Preparations for the job move have been underway for some time. Gurvinder Singh of Indus Teleservices, Mumbai, India will be assuming the office of President as of Jan. 16th.

Mr. Singh was born in the United States while his Indian parents were vacationing at Niagara Falls, thus making him eligible for the position. He will receive a salary of $320 (USD) a month but with no health coverage or other benefits.

It is believed that Mr. Singh will be able to handle his job responsibilities without a support staff. Due to the time difference between the US and India, he will be working primarily at night, when few offices of the US Government will be open. ‘Working nights will allow me to keep my day job at the American Express call center,’ stated Mr. Singh in an exclusive interview. ‘I am excited about this position. I always hoped I would be President someday.’

A Congressional Spokesperson noted that while Mr. Singh may not be fully aware of all the issues involved in the office of President, this should not be a problem because Bush was not familiar with the issues either.

Mr. Singh will rely upon a script tree that will enable him to respond effectively to most topics of concern. Using these canned responses, he can address common concerns without having to understand the underlying issues at all.

‘We know these scripting tools work,’ stated the spokesperson.

‘President Bush has used them successfully for years.’ Mr. Singh may have problems with the Texas drawl, but lately Bush has abandoned the ‘down home’ persona in his effort to appear intelligent and on top of the Katrina situation.

Bush will receive health coverage, expenses, and salary until his final day of employment. Following a two week waiting period, he will be eligible for $240 a week unemployment for 13 weeks. Unfortunately he will not be eligible for Medicaid, as his unemployment benefits will exceed the allowed limit.

Mr. Bush has been provided the outplacement services of Manpower, Inc. to help him write a resumé and prepare for his upcoming job transition.

According to Manpower, Mr. Bush may have difficulties in securing a new position due to limited practical work experience. A Greeter position at Wal-Mart was suggested due to Bush’s extensive experience shaking hands.

Another possibility is Bush’s reenlistment in the Texas Air National Guard. His prior records are conspicuously vague but should he choose this option, he would likely be stationed in Waco, TX for a month, before being sent to Iraq, a country he has visited. ‘I’ve been there, I know all about Iraq,’ stated Mr. Bush, who gained invaluable knowledge of the country in a visit to Baghdad Airport.

Sources in Baghdad and Falluja say Mr. Bush would receive a warm reception from local Iraqis. They have asked to be provided with details of his arrival so that they might arrange an appropriate welcome.”

[Electrophil]

Hilarious!

Bipa, I think you are here in the U.S., was born here, and have at least a Master's degree from a U.S. University. I think you are playing us.

Your grammer, spelling and overall writing abilities are U.S. graduate level, and your knowledge of both current events and history of the U.S. rates way up there also on a graduate level.

It's a dad-burn Kinspirasy I tellya. I kin feel it in me bones!

[Electrophil]

On a serious note from the joke, I think we should pay more than $400k to our president. Maybe then, we wouldn't get some....washed up, cocaine snorting, alcoholic, failed business'ing, bankrupting, AWOL'ing, uneducated, bad grammered, bungling loser son from a prominent robber-baron family.. as the administrator of the worlds largest economy, and commander in chief of the worlds only surviving military superpower.

My gosh, we have V.P.'s at casinos here in Vegas that makes more than the president does.

Huh! A National guard unit with a tank just pulled up in front of my house....

I wonder what that's all about.....