There's also a story you always here when you are a kid that St. Patrick was great because he chased all the snakes out of Ireland. Some kind of folk hero story. I guess it is true there are no snakes anywhere in the wild in Ireland (Joe?), but of course one guy didn't magically chase them all out, it probably had more to do with continental drift before the ice ages or something.
Maybe I'm full of BS though.
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Well, Mac, not so much BS as a misguided version of Erin history. Let me try to "straighten out your tale", heh-heh. Yes, St. Patrick was indeed credited with snake extermination, & while driving the slithery creatures into the sea, along with the lemmings I might add, he encountered along the same path one Pied Piper of Hamlin, who was similarly herding mass quantities of rodents towards the same fate. Now you can imagine the chaos ensuing with a snake & rodent meeting along the same route. Thousands of snakes devouring thousands of rodents was NOT a postcard moment for the Emerald Isle. Help was needed quickly to rid the countryside of the expanse of bloated, now sluggish serpents. Fortunately this chaotic scene took place within a stone's throw of assistance. Yes, luckily there was facility of incarceration for an unfortunate group of disease ridden dwarf Irish folks. They suffered from a slow body dissolving affliction, that was so disfiguring, that none were hired into normal occupations, thus were left to subsist mainly by stealing food & money from the general populace. However, most were caught, prosecuted & spent their lives behide bars. (Imagine Irish people behind bars. Hahahahaha). Uh....Sorry. Anyway, St. Patrick banged on the heavy doors of the prison, arousing the warden, & begged assistance from within. "If you set these poor souls free to help me clean the pristine Irish countryside of this slimy mess, I shall bequeath thee with a pot o' gold, & keg o' bitters". "Gold-schmold", said the warden, "Where's the brewski"?
Thus, the entire population of leper-cons was released to assist St. Patrick drag the putrid piles of groggy reptiles to the cliffs of the sea to join the tide of lemmings. To this day, the leper-cons have remained free, & are honorably employed in Ireland's booming computer industry. They're called trolls.
Ron (Having green dreams).