ok got word from the tranny shop his comments were:

Yes it seems to be slipping. Yes the fliter was cleaned. Yes there were metal flakes in the oil, and he described how the tranny shifts in the SVX, something about normal pressure for most tranny shift cycles using 180 pds of pressure but the SVX is kinda wierd that the computer lowers the pressure to 70-80 pds halfway through the shift (to soften the shift) and then returns to 180 to complete the shift. He said this causes majoy wear on components after 50-60k of use and shorterns tranny life. He did not mention weither the plates where bad (just did a tranny flush didn't open it) and he says he can rebuild it for like $2800 upgrading most of the components inside and and extra $500 for some computer deal that keeps the pressure at 180 pds for the entire shift cycle. I called a Subaru dealer and Holy cow... they want like 5k for a new tranny (core is worth $1200) for a total of $3800 and thats not installing it. Ahw man this goes from bad to worse.....the wife is gonna love this... So by unplugging the deal in the engine bay ( trans resistor??) will that keep the pressure at 180 and maybe help it stay in 4th gear...and ok if this works... what kind of long term damage am I looking at by doing this... and should i just have the tranny rebuilt and then do that...I mean I'm not mechinal i just sell cars -lol- when a tranny is going... there typically is nothing you can do about it other than replace or fix...I just did a test drive with the transmission resistor unplugged ...no change same problem (when cruiseing in 4th...and a pressure on the gas sends the the RPMS to 4k-4100 and then it seems like it wants to shift but jut doesn't kick the RPMS)
...just a footnote when i bought the car I didn't know the "power" light on the dash ment anything well come to find out its the code light and mine blinks 16 or 17 times...and when i unplugged the trans ressistor (or whatever the thing is) it only blinked twice......hummm. (have yet to plug it back in.)