Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

So I went and saw "District 9" last night (meh:rolleyes:), and as usual had to take a mid-movie leak to purge the Starbucks consumed just beforehand. I walk into an empty restroom, and do my usual thing of taking a farthest left or right urinal, as to leave any consequent guy entering ample space away from where im doing my business. This was in a row of about 6 or 7 urinals, with a few stalls directly behind.

Just as I start letting loose, I hear the door open and some dude shuffle in doing this blowing through the lips while grunting thing. Im in the far right urinal, farthest from the door. The guy has an open field of pissers in front of him, and doesnt even have to be within 10 feet of me. What does he do might you be asking?? You guessed it.... bleepface pulls right in the spot next to me, and proceeds to verbalize his apparent relief of draining his bladder. As if the flagrantly deliberate proximity werent horrendous enough..... bleepface turns to me, as im hastily zipping up, and asks " Do you know who won the Angels game?'' All I could do in my disgust was blurt out the F word and shake my head as I walked out in silence.

WHO THE BLEEP PURPOSELY PASSES UP 5 OPEN URINALS TO TAKE THE ONE NEXT TO THE ONLY GUY IN THERE??? ARE YOU %$#&ING KIDDING ME???!!!

Guys CODE OF CONDUCT RULE NUMBER ONE: In an empty restroom, an open urinal adjacent to one thats already in use, FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST DONT TAKE THAT ONE!!! Keep at least an empty urinal between you and the other guy AT ALL TIMES!!! If theres no open space like that, USE THE STALLS!! Stalls are full too? HOLD IT OR PISS YOUR GODDAMN PANTS!!! Just dont do it man, please for %$&#s sake, just dont......

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

The only time the buffer zone rule may be overlooked is at a crowded venue with lines for the pissers (sports event, concert, popular bar, etc) because if you don't take the open spot, someone else will and you will be the one who ends up pissing your pants.

There is also the "do not talk to me while I'm pissing" rule, which this guy also seems to have broken. :rolleyes: This man needs a refresh on the rules. :p

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

I think you misunderstood his intentions :rolleyes:

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

lol yeah that would kind of freak me out too!

The other night at the bowling alley I was sitting on the can, and this guy comes in and starts taking a leak, then I hear this earth-shaking fart, followed by "Wow that was a good fart, huh?". I suggested he check his drawers, and then he zipped up and on the way out told me to "Have a good one man"

I'm pretty sure he was drunk though. (I was pretty buzzed too, as I was halfway through a pitcher of Drop Top...)

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Someones a little "pee shy" :lol:

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Thats funny!! And its funny because the stranger didnt mosey up shoulder to shoulder (in an empty bathroom!!) to you while he did it.

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

How wide was your stance? :lol::lol:

-Bill

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Ok ok its obvious ill get no sympathy HERE :mad: ..... I hope the next time you guys are standing at a public urinal, some guy prances up behind you and softly sniffs the back of your neck! :lol:

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Poor guy was just trying to be friendly:lol::lol::lol::lol:... But some people don't see a problem with it.

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

maybe he wanted to play "show and tell"? :lol:

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

that'll happen at places i frequent.

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Was it similar to this:lol:

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

stop tapping your foot under the divider next time.

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

I completely agree with you SoCal. I hate when guys do that.

One time when I was at BAR Pittsburgh years ago, this hot girl came in the mens restroom. She must have had to pee really bad and could not wait the the womens line. A bunch of us in there saw her run into the stall. Guys instantly responded looking through the cracks and then they nearly broke the damn door off!! Lucky for her she got out unharmed.

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

I will always but the max possible space between me and the next guy. Depending on how wasted I am I don't mind talking to the guy next to me lol.

That's ****ing sad.

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

If the urinals have dividers, being next to somebody isn't too bad. However, if there are open urinals, then you should be as far away from the next person as you can be.

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

.







.

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Sad but true. I bet in Canada that kind of stuff don't happen. Nearly 0 crime and free health care, I would live there but it's too damn cold.:)

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

I have to agree with the "do not talk while pissing" rule.


Little story here:
The principal of my school, Mr. Haynes, is a large African American man who is always greeting people, or coming up and shaking your hand. His coin phrase is "whats up brotha-man (or sister-girl).

Well, one time Im standing at the urinal and in walks Mr. Haynes. He goes to the urinal next to me, places his hand on my shoulder and says "Hows it goin brotha-man".
Luckily I was just about finished; i got out of there quick.
Probably didnt think anything of his actions, but man, I was kinda creeped out.
I mean you just dont do that

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Just as bad, and this has happened to me before also.....

A single stand-up urinal in the bathroom.... you're about to do your thing, a guy walks in with his kid, tells the kid he will have to wait until YOU are done..... and proceeds to stand right behind you, with his kid, in complete silence. I could not for the life of me even start.... with 2 beady and 2 little beady eyes burning into the back of my trousers. What were they going to listen for, duration? Technique?

I cant fathom why how someone could feel comfortable standing 2 feet behind another guy, in a dead silent bathroom, waiting for the shake and jiggle. Maybe ill just wet my pants from now on....

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

I don't know how many of you have ever been to Wrigley Field but there aren't even urinals, there is just one large "trough". I always wait for a stall when I need to go, otherwise I hold it til we get across the street to the Taco Bell who's drive through also doubles ass the Wrigley Field Parking lot.

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

the state fair used to have troughs until charmin donated new facilities

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

I remember going to the fair in California once, and my Dad took me and my little brother to the bathroom (I think I was 10 and my brother was 2 or 3) and it was a big trough thing, and my brother looks over and blurts out "Daddy, that man's pee pee is funny looking" or something like that, and the whole restroom started chuckling and the guy like, looked at my dad and said "What can you do? Kids will be kids!" or something like that. My dad was worried the guy was going to like, clock him or something.

One of my old co-workers took his kids to a bathroom like that, and this large African American man came in and stood next to one of the kids, and he looked over, then looked back at his dad and goes "Dad, that man's wee wee is a lot bigger than yours" :lol:

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

That's how it used to be at the old Atlanta-Fulton County Stadium. Nastiest restrooms I've ever encountered. Wait for a stall and you'd miss half the game. Check that: You didn't want to see what was in the stalls.

I once went to a roadhouse in rural Tennessee that had a gravel floor, and the lone communal urinal was an old claw-foot bathtub. At least one's shoes didn't get drenched like at Atlanta Stadium.

dcb

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Still have the big single urinal at our county fairgrounds and dragstrip. Hell I still piss off my back porch when both toilets are occupied at home:lol:

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Yep been to the old Fulton stadium many times, but actually the thing that got me the most is that women would come in to use the stalls in the mens restroom. Now that bothered me. I was tempted to turn around and shake the hell out of it right in front of them.

I don't like troughs or unseparated urinals either, but understand the reasons for them. But, while I don't like them--when I have to pee, I have to pee and lack of privacy is not going to cause any problems for me. Of course, you have to be comfortable with your "equipment". I can see where someone that plays shortstop :p might have a real problem. :)

Lee

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Oh geeze, Id still be a little hesitant even if mine were swinging back and forth by my knees. And how do you catch someone staring at it without looking at the other guys faces, and possibly making eye contact :eek::eek:?? That would immediately seize my stream and id pack up and leave right then. Ack!

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

SoCal..... the guy was probably gay...... and you just got hit on.

I spent a year in Korea (2000-2001)..... where if you go downtown, you're likely to come across a restroom that is not only unisex, but has absolutely no urinals whatsoever.

In fact, many didn't even have toilets.

Just holes in the ground..... with two foot marks on either side. So while you're draining the main vein, 80 year old agima is squatting next to you taking herself a gigantic stinky kimchi dump.

Could be worse man.

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Reminds me of the movie My Bestfriend's Girl where Dane Cook is in the restroom looking at some guy in the face while urinating and is like "YEeaa! what you working with! I wan that in my mouth!" lol
:lol:

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Kinda reminds me of the gym code of conduct. :lol::lol:

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

5:30 "Monster loaf". :lol: "Butt pudding". :lol::lol:

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

I had a two girls do that once in Maryland. They were in there when I came in. The one got pissed off that I used the urnial while they were in the stall. She felt I should wait outside. I told her it was the mens room if she didn't like it get the hell out.

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

Don't know how it is now because I haven't been in 10+ years, but back in the day it wasn't unusual for young women to use the men's facilities at Chastain Park Amphitheater; even if it meant standing in line. Facilities for women there were limited, but something tells me alcohol was a minor factor in this.

dcb

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

yeah, and now they make a product for women (www.go-girl.com) that is essentially an anatomically formed funnel that they can use to whiz standing up (boy, talk about penis-envy!) ...... and then wash, rinse, repeat.


It's a little unnerving to have a hot chick setup next to you at the urinal and let go the golden flow and be thrilled about it..

Re: Mens Restroom CODE OF CONDUCT !!
 

I just entered their sweepstakes :lol: http://www.go-girl.com/sweepstake.asp
could use some scuba gear:D