Sitting Down for dinner
 

I couldn't agree more. We sit EVERY night possible as a family. Discuss the day and pass the bread.

The 1 1/2 year old "Spirited One" seems to have difficulty keeping her butt in the seat, however.

She does say PEEZZ and TANK U though :)

I've got to post some pictures of my little darlin's...

Re: lets take the pressure off aredubjay
 

That's a stupid idea. In essence, this place would be a popularity contest. If someone is really tactful and never states an opinion, they'll stay on here. If someone speaks their mind and upsets more than five people, they're gone. I guess this idea would be great if you wanted to 'vanillify' the place, but to me that seems extremely boring.

- Ca$h

PS: What would happen if Aredubjay did a moderator 'job' and 5 people complained about it? would he ban himself? Bah. Like I said. Dumb idea.

Ca$h, it is not what you say, but how you say it that can get others in an uproar. Differences in opinions are great and contribute to everyone's learning process.

However, if one states their opinion either with vulgarities or with a "know it all" attitude, most people will tune out the meaning and will perceive the message negatively.

The key in getting your message across is to get others to focus on and understand the message instead of the delivery.

Matt

How to Win Friends and Infuence People
 

We should ALL read that book.

It's all about listening my friends.....

Re: Re: lets take the pressure off aredubjay
 

If five people complain, darned right, I'll ban myself. Like I've said before, I haven't the ability to "ban" anyone . . . except myself. Which has been a strong consideration since you've come on board. If I did have the ability to ban, it would be on the merits of more than five people, and in that case, you'd be gone.

My only concern is losing ten meimbers because of one. It's true that one bad apple don't spoil the bunch, but it's also a fact of life that when someone fills a room with a stench, the room becomes vacated except for the person causing the stench, because they can't smell it themselves.

I don't want to "vanilify" anything, I just want you to stop your negative tirades. So far, everything anyone has said has drawn your negative retorts. If this is such a bad place, with such moronic, idiotic, retarded, vanilla people, then leave. Pure and simple.

Wow!
 

<<If this is such a bad place, with such moronic, idiotic, retarded, vanilla people, then leave. Pure and simple.>>

Now you've gone and got Randy in a fuss. That's no way to be....

Can't we all just get along.....?

Ca$h, your statement "That is a stupid idea" is exactly how not to start a discussion. It frames your negative OPINION as fact and immediately puts the originator on the defensive. A better start would have been "I disagree with this idea". It would have gotten your point across without insulting the originator as having stupid ideas and therefore being stupid himself.

If you can't learn these simple nuances of communication, then it is your own fault.

Matt

Re: Re: lets take the pressure off aredubjay
 

You need a lesson cash. Not a stupid idea, just one you don't agree with. This is exactly the kind of poor disrespectful behavior that that starts these problems.
:rolleyes:

Re: Re: lets take the pressure off aredubjay
 

Okay, folks. I'm sorry, but this one's got me tweaked.

Cash, you've been here for one month. I've been here for almost two years. You havn't been here long enough to get to know what anyone has contributed to this board, nor have you cared to get to know people. Would you think that I would still be here if people didn't want me here. No. I'd have the good sense to leave. In that short (okay, long) month, you've amassed almost 350 posts, most of which I wouldn't insult my septic tank with by flushing them down the toilet.

I think I state my opinions very well, even using tact. In fact, I'd say most people here get their points across very well without the insulting nonsense you seem to think it takes. And, inasmuch, we can disagree without having to be verbose and we can all get along. I mean, if bluntness is what you want, I'm perfectly capable of being blunt.

Let's say, for the sake of argument (not that you need a sake), that this WAS a popularity contest. You've lost.

I know that, which is why I have a problem with it. I'm NOT a bad guy. At all. I'm polite, generous, and really easy to get along with. This is what pisses me off, I'm BLUNT. When someone suggests a STUPID idea, I'm not going to sugar coat it. That idea was STUPID. Just because someone says it like it is doesn't mean that they should be banned. If you recall the FIRST post I made here, I recieved a response that was completely and totally out of line. I came here wanting great things, and one of your UTOPIAN members literally threw it right back in my face. Maybe instead of being so 'offended' you should look in the mirror. I'm NOT out to piss anybody off, I'm not out to annoy people, I'm just here to meet some new people who share my interests.

Anyway.

- Rob

<I'm NOT a bad guy. At all. I'm polite, generous, and really easy to get along with.>

Uhm, I'll let that one speak for itself.

<This is what pisses me off, I'm BLUNT.>

No, you're not "Blunt" you're belligerent. There's a difference. I appreciate bluntness. I abhor belligerence.

<When someone suggests a STUPID idea, I'm not going to sugar coat it. That idea was STUPID. Just because someone says it like it is doesn't mean that they should be banned.>

"Stupid" is your opinion. If you said something like "I think that's a stupid idea" it's a little different from acting as if your "autoratative expertise" deems something to be so. That's not "sugar coating" that's accepting the responsibility for your opinion instead of wholesale demoralization.


<If you recall the FIRST post I made here, I recieved a response that was completely and totally out of line. I came here wanting great things, and one of your UTOPIAN members literally threw it right back in my face.>

I just read your first post. Most of it seemed to be an attempt to teach this board what an SVX was. The rest was The first two posts that followed were kind and warm welcomes. The third post was from a girl who was less than happy with your sexist line, "I learned how to drive stick in it, how to handle girls in it, everything." Being rather BLUNT (something you should appreciate), and using absolutely no profanity, nor real insults, she basically told you how she felt, and, at least added the caveat, "sorry guys, i am not in the greatest mood today......" To which you responded, in what has come to be your typical manner, "Greetings asshole," and went off on one of your patented tirades. Sounds like a case of not being able to take what one dishes out, to me.

<Maybe instead of being so 'offended' you should look in the mirror.>

I can look in the mirror. I have no problems with what I see. Offense is not the problem here. Attitude is the problem here.

<I'm NOT out to piss anybody off>

Then don't.

<I'm not out to annoy people>

You could've fooled me.

<I'm just here to meet some new people who share my interests.>

Your interests seem to be pissing people off and annoying them. So, I'll have to hand it to you there. You're doing a FINE job.

Re: Re: lets take the pressure off aredubjay
 

PLONK
(again)

Ahhh - order has been restored to my happy svx world.

Ok - I've counted to 10, taken 5 deep breaths and I guess I have to comment now.

quote "I'm NOT a bad guy. At all. I'm polite, generous, and really easy to get along with."

I'm sorry, but you do not seem very polite to me when you call people who don't agree with you stupid or morons, and that doesn't seem very easy to get along with either. The only person you seem to get along with or agree with is yourself, and I am a little surprised that you don't have problems with yourself at times. Just because you think that an idea is STUPID doesn't automatically make it stupid. Being disrespectful to other members is also something I have problems with. The way you talk to women, as well as other members does not exibit being polite either.

quote "This is what pisses me off, I'm BLUNT. When someone suggests a STUPID idea, I'm not going to sugar coat it. That idea was STUPID."

Yes, you are BLUNT, and very abrasive as well. Not all of us here see eye to eye with you (thank goodness) when it comes to how we look at things. Just because someone says something that I don't agree with doesn't make it STUPID. No, this is not a popularity contest, but it is someplace that some of us have enjoyed for a long time exchanging ideas without being called names or have ideas or thoughts called stupid. There have been many people that have invested time, money, and effort to make this the best SVX Org. that there is. WE Believe In This Place to exchange ideas and educate others. It is a shame when someone comes into this place and makes waves. Randy said that you do not know much about this organization. I will second that thought. If you had any idea of what has gone on here and any history of this group of people, you might just respect it a little more! (no, that is a little too much to expect isn't it) Unfortunatly it is not the fun and enjoyable place it used to be, and I miss it.

If one person pushes another, they most likely will get pushed back. That is the normal cycle. Well, you have pushed, and I haven't really seen much pushing back, YET. I do not normally get to this point of being BLUNT, but I guess that is what is needed to at least be heard at this time, but it still might not be heard even now.

Before posting, you should ask yourself if this is going to add positive benifit or informaion to the thread. If not, deleate the message that you have started. I have done this a few times, because I was not sure how it would be taken. If I don't know that it will be benificial, I don't post the message. I am not trying to sound like I know it all, or you should be like me, but I think that it needs to be said. I have never responded to a thread like this before, but I could not be silent anymore and not say something about the issue. Yes, I think that my post is for the good of the order. Thank You.

Opinion noted.

- Ca$h

golly fellas
 

in the immortal words of Rodney King "Can't we all just get along???
ok as someone who had a disagreement with Larry III that was played out in the thread "I hate all other drivers"... it was squashed like gentlemen when all viewpoints were discussed...misunderstandings occur...also please keep in mind that the language used by certain groups (be it age,race,etc) among themselves may not be offensive to them but to outsiders it may seem downright offensive...
I don't claim to know the answer to this but as someone who has gone through this recently I felt I should say...er um write something...Squiggy